Meet "James"

“James” grew up in whales, but moved to Reading, Berkshire just west of London England, at the age of 11. Coming to a new school at that age always seems to be pretty rough. The fact that James was from Whales didn’t help things, neither did the fact that he had never known his father, or the fact that his mom only had one leg.

Kids can be really cruel, but kids at Catholic school can be down right malicious.

James was an only child and because of his moms missing appendage, and his complete lack of social skills, James spent most of his time at home helping his mom with various things around the house.

He’d had an amazing relationship with his mother Ariane. She was the only person he could talk to, let alone spill his guts to, so when she passed away, on his 21st birthday, he was utterly devastated. They had gone for a bike ride, but when her one pant leg got stuck in the chain, and her brakes failed, she didn’t have another leg to put down. She couldn’t stop, and went careening into an intersection where she was greeted by a truck carrying young calves that where headed to the slaughter.

James became a vegetarian.

James didn’t have very fond memories of school, and the thought of college was overwhelming to say the least. James had spent the 3 years since school dreaming of traveling and trying to save money by working at a local chip shop. Once his mother had passed James came to find a freedom he had never known. He missed his Mother, but all of a sudden realized that he didn’t have to worry about her. He no longer worried if she was able to get to the store for groceries (They had bought a 1961 Opel Olympia Rekord PII sedan, which only came in standard, and having only one leg, she was unable to use a clutch), or if she was able to get out to the rabbit coup to feed Buttons.

It started with James staying out late at the local pub, and even meeting a girl, but before he knew it James had sold the small 2 bedroom flat, cashed out his decent sized inheritance, and decided to follow his life long dream of traveling the world.

An amazing thing happened to him while James was traveling. People started to like him. He found himself constantly the center of attention. He would be surrounded by travelers in the hostel pubs telling funny stories about his mother, like the one about her being chased by a yorkshire terrier that wasn’t actually from anywhere near Yorkshire (you should hear that one sometime, hilarious). He was a great story teller.

Eventually James found himself in Australia. He was broke, but in love. He had been in the hospital for an appendectomy when he stumbled into the amputation ward and saw Sandy, a beautiful young diabetic who had just lost her big toe to an infection. James struck up a conversation and before you know it Sandy had quit her job, as a Receptionist at a wholesale meat suppliers called McWinnies Sausages, became a vegetarian and started to travel with James.

They couple eventually found themselves in Canada where James tried his hand at writing. James had tremendous success when a company agreed to publish his war memoirs under the Pseudonym William Jansen. This was done for two reasons
1. All of the stories he wrote in the book were told to him by a man named bill, whom he had met in while traveling in Greece. Bill had served in the 43 regiment of the US Army and,
2. Because James was only 5 by the time the war had ended.

James and Sandy never had any children. They live a comfortable life in North Vancouver, where James has become an avid Fisherman. In fact upon hearing from his publisher, and being notified that his book had been optioned for a movie, he went out a purchased a fishing boat that he named Ariane.

He opted for the twin engine model.